The Long Wait
Tomorrow between 2:30 and 4:30. It is the moment I have both longed for and dreaded for the past few months. It is time to face the building inspector.
Tomorrow is my rough-in inspection. Rather, I should say my first rough-in inspection. I'm going to go ahead and say that I'm not going to pass, that he is going to red flag all kinds of stuff for me to fix, so that way I don't get my hopes up and get too excited about moving on and getting insulation installed or anything.
It is a two-edged sword, because this has to be done in order to move on and finish the project, but at the same time he has the power to say say, "No, why don't you take the whole roof off and start over again." OK, that is probably extreme, but the thought of a guy going around with a tape measure and a fine toothed comb examining my building job, that's a little scary.
You could argue that it is for my own good, and that if I did it correctly I don't have anything to worry about. You could also argue that if I did something incorrectly I should want to know about it and make corrections so that the building is strong and lasts and is a good investment.
This is true, but it sure is a lot easier to just put the material together in whatever way I can make it fit, and call it good. I'd rather be able to fudge it a bit and not have to worry about the codes and regulations. That would make the whole thing go a lot faster, that is for sure.
So tomorrow my hobby as an amateur builder goes on display for the building inspector for the first time.
It kind of makes me think - I wonder if that's why people want to keep God at a distance, why they try to avoid church and anything that smacks of religious significance. Is it because they get this perception that God is some kind of cosmic building inspector who combs through your life and garbage looking for mistakes that he can point out and make you try to repair?
We might argue that this is for your own good, that correcting the messes that we've made in our amateur approach to spirituality will only lead to a stronger, healthier you with more self-worth and confidence then you have now.
We might argue that, but it doesn't make it any easier. Who wants to go through the microscope? Who wants to be exposed to such scrutiny and testing? Not me. I'm sitting here sweating an inspection of my own tomorrow - and that's only for a building. I mean, think about the comparison in investment. Ya, there is a lot of money invested in my family room project, but how much more of an investment is it for me to try to lead my own soul? A mistake in my house could cost me thousands of dollars, but what would a mistake in my spirit cost me?
I don't think that God is a cosmic building inspector. I don't think that he has a giant stack of red stickers ready to place them all over our spiritual life. There might be a time and place for that, and he definitely does correct us, but I don't think that he makes a list of demands and says, "fix these things and I'll be back on Thursday." That's not who God is. A relationship with God is not contingent on cleaning up a bunch of messes and satisfying a list of rules. I think that there are things he points out to us that he wants us to change, places he wants to inspire us to grow, but these things are always our choice. Our freewill always comes into play here and we say, "Have your own way, God" or God says to us, "Have it your own way." It's just that it is much better to have it God's way, isn't it?
So here I sit, waiting for the building inspector. I'm really stressing out about it. I know that he is going to find fault with something. There will be something that he wants changed or fixed, and I guess I will fix it and move on. And afterwards - well afterwards there is a prize in store for me. It is in the form of a new family room, a place for my family to spend time together, and the first time we will have a room in our house in which more than 4 people can sit comfortably. If I can just keep that in mind, it will be worth the effort and scrutiny.
Will God find fault with me? I know that there are things in my life that have to be changed, places I amateurishly threw a few scraps together and called it good. Do I want God to expose those places and deal with them? Do I want to keep my eye on the prize at the life that God has in store for me?
I guess you'd have to ask me tomorrow:)
Tomorrow is my rough-in inspection. Rather, I should say my first rough-in inspection. I'm going to go ahead and say that I'm not going to pass, that he is going to red flag all kinds of stuff for me to fix, so that way I don't get my hopes up and get too excited about moving on and getting insulation installed or anything.
It is a two-edged sword, because this has to be done in order to move on and finish the project, but at the same time he has the power to say say, "No, why don't you take the whole roof off and start over again." OK, that is probably extreme, but the thought of a guy going around with a tape measure and a fine toothed comb examining my building job, that's a little scary.
You could argue that it is for my own good, and that if I did it correctly I don't have anything to worry about. You could also argue that if I did something incorrectly I should want to know about it and make corrections so that the building is strong and lasts and is a good investment.
This is true, but it sure is a lot easier to just put the material together in whatever way I can make it fit, and call it good. I'd rather be able to fudge it a bit and not have to worry about the codes and regulations. That would make the whole thing go a lot faster, that is for sure.
So tomorrow my hobby as an amateur builder goes on display for the building inspector for the first time.
It kind of makes me think - I wonder if that's why people want to keep God at a distance, why they try to avoid church and anything that smacks of religious significance. Is it because they get this perception that God is some kind of cosmic building inspector who combs through your life and garbage looking for mistakes that he can point out and make you try to repair?
We might argue that this is for your own good, that correcting the messes that we've made in our amateur approach to spirituality will only lead to a stronger, healthier you with more self-worth and confidence then you have now.
We might argue that, but it doesn't make it any easier. Who wants to go through the microscope? Who wants to be exposed to such scrutiny and testing? Not me. I'm sitting here sweating an inspection of my own tomorrow - and that's only for a building. I mean, think about the comparison in investment. Ya, there is a lot of money invested in my family room project, but how much more of an investment is it for me to try to lead my own soul? A mistake in my house could cost me thousands of dollars, but what would a mistake in my spirit cost me?
I don't think that God is a cosmic building inspector. I don't think that he has a giant stack of red stickers ready to place them all over our spiritual life. There might be a time and place for that, and he definitely does correct us, but I don't think that he makes a list of demands and says, "fix these things and I'll be back on Thursday." That's not who God is. A relationship with God is not contingent on cleaning up a bunch of messes and satisfying a list of rules. I think that there are things he points out to us that he wants us to change, places he wants to inspire us to grow, but these things are always our choice. Our freewill always comes into play here and we say, "Have your own way, God" or God says to us, "Have it your own way." It's just that it is much better to have it God's way, isn't it?
So here I sit, waiting for the building inspector. I'm really stressing out about it. I know that he is going to find fault with something. There will be something that he wants changed or fixed, and I guess I will fix it and move on. And afterwards - well afterwards there is a prize in store for me. It is in the form of a new family room, a place for my family to spend time together, and the first time we will have a room in our house in which more than 4 people can sit comfortably. If I can just keep that in mind, it will be worth the effort and scrutiny.
Will God find fault with me? I know that there are things in my life that have to be changed, places I amateurishly threw a few scraps together and called it good. Do I want God to expose those places and deal with them? Do I want to keep my eye on the prize at the life that God has in store for me?
I guess you'd have to ask me tomorrow:)
posted by Jeff at 11:11 AM
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